why is this such a big deal?

i got absolutely annoyed with my grandmother last night. over a compliment. yep. she was telling me that she could really see that my face and neck were looking thinner and i got really annoyed about it.

i've been told, by one of my best friends no less, that i'm really bad about taking compliments. and i know where that comes from. it's called the negative self-image. and i have a bad case of it. i think i look gross, and i hate my haircut, so why would anyone else think it's a good cut, let alone think I'M pretty?

i always thought that weight loss was something extremely personal - why would i want anyone else involved in it? and i didn't. still don't, on most things. surprisingly, i don't mind sharing my journey with the other people at WW because they're on a similar journey and have experienced similar challenges in their lives. i don't even mind sharing with my mom, because we've become good friends over the last 2 years and i know she gets it. but i do mind sharing with people who really have no business in my business. like my co-workers. or even the rest of my family. and you know why i don't want to share with them? BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO TAKE THE COMPLIMENTS! how ridiculous is that?

why is it so hard for me to take a compliment? i mean, really. all i have to do is say "thanks" and go on my way. but i can't. i get annoyed. like they're just trying to tell me things they think i want to hear so that i'll "feel better." which makes me think that the compliments aren't genuine. i know that's all my stuff to deal with, because seriously, who hates being complimented?