creak
blowing to remove dust
rip
alright, so not exactly the best onomatopoeic description of me dusting off the old blog and starting a new post, but you get the point.
it's been nearly 2 years since i've posted on this thing. i spent some time posting updates to my blog on the weight watchers site, but haven't visited that in months either. i don't have the luxury of writing detailed updates at work, mostly because i like my job and would like to keep it, and also because i am CRAZY busy most of the time. by the time i get home, i have little desire to sit in front of another computer screen and wax poetic (or whatever you might call this blather. interestingly enough, i have no problem rotting my mind in front of the tv for hours each night).
either way, i know that journaling, in whatever form it may take, is the best way for me to let out frustrations, brag a little, and just generally work out things that might be causing me angst. so maybe it's time to brush off the old blog, start carrying my journal with me, and write when the itch strikes.
02 January 2013
14 February 2011
pajama pants, hoodies, and PB2
i'm feeling a little more on track than i was, and it's good to feel that way. not complacent, but diligent, and trying not to get down on myself for those little "mistakes" that are just living life. the last few days - especially with the 2 feet of snow we've seen in the first 7 days of the month - have been a great time for remembering those little things that make life, especially life with a weight problem, tolerable.
1. pajama pants and hoodies. nothing beats coming home from the gym, stripping off sweaty clothes and putting on snuggly warm pajamas and a hoodie. and they're good for getting to/from the gym without freezing.
2. my trainer, marko. even when i hurt for days after a session, it's a good hurt. when i come to a session in a bad/stressed mood, he helps it dissipate and helps me channel my frustration in a productive way. plus, he doesn't speak english too well, so trying to understand him definitely distracts me from the hard workout he's putting me through.
3. reworked comfort foods. amazing chili and delicious mac and cheese - the things that i want to eat on a cold, snowy day - without all the fat but with all the taste.
4. PB2. if you haven't discovered this peanut butter from bell plantation, get yourself some. it's powdered peanuts and sugar and salt - that's it!- you add some water and have a great tasting peanut butter without the oil. it's creamy and definitely helps this peanut butter addict get some protein with her apples and celery without the high PPV cost. 2 Tbsp = 1 PPV.
5. protein powder. an odd thing to be happy about, for sure, but honestly, i started drinking it after my workouts again, and i'm less famished. i drink it alongside a banana or other fruit, and it helps sate me until i can get to a real meal, which is usually 20-30 minutes after i leave the gym, at a minimum.
6. friends who challenge me. the fight for air climb is in 2 weeks, and i'm going to kick tush. i did the 56-story climb in 12:10 last year, and i will break 12 minutes this year. after that, it's time to start training for the bolderboulder, a 10k race on memorial day.
7. new jeans. i bought some new 10s the other day online, and they fit perfectly, even out of the dryer. nothing feels better than a pair of jeans that are warm from the dryer, not from the sweat you worked up trying to get into them.
there's more, i'm sure. but today, these in particular are helping me stay sane.
1. pajama pants and hoodies. nothing beats coming home from the gym, stripping off sweaty clothes and putting on snuggly warm pajamas and a hoodie. and they're good for getting to/from the gym without freezing.
2. my trainer, marko. even when i hurt for days after a session, it's a good hurt. when i come to a session in a bad/stressed mood, he helps it dissipate and helps me channel my frustration in a productive way. plus, he doesn't speak english too well, so trying to understand him definitely distracts me from the hard workout he's putting me through.
3. reworked comfort foods. amazing chili and delicious mac and cheese - the things that i want to eat on a cold, snowy day - without all the fat but with all the taste.
4. PB2. if you haven't discovered this peanut butter from bell plantation, get yourself some. it's powdered peanuts and sugar and salt - that's it!- you add some water and have a great tasting peanut butter without the oil. it's creamy and definitely helps this peanut butter addict get some protein with her apples and celery without the high PPV cost. 2 Tbsp = 1 PPV.
5. protein powder. an odd thing to be happy about, for sure, but honestly, i started drinking it after my workouts again, and i'm less famished. i drink it alongside a banana or other fruit, and it helps sate me until i can get to a real meal, which is usually 20-30 minutes after i leave the gym, at a minimum.
6. friends who challenge me. the fight for air climb is in 2 weeks, and i'm going to kick tush. i did the 56-story climb in 12:10 last year, and i will break 12 minutes this year. after that, it's time to start training for the bolderboulder, a 10k race on memorial day.
7. new jeans. i bought some new 10s the other day online, and they fit perfectly, even out of the dryer. nothing feels better than a pair of jeans that are warm from the dryer, not from the sweat you worked up trying to get into them.
there's more, i'm sure. but today, these in particular are helping me stay sane.
06 December 2010
what a weekend!
whew. i'm glad it's monday. (yes, i just said that) it was quite the weekend - but you know what? this weekend was great. and it made me really appreciate the new program. i ate a lot, but never once felt deprived. and when i was hungry, i just had some fruit! adam was making fun of me - let's just say that i've had a lot of bananas this week :)
friday: invited a bunch of friends over for dinner, during the preparation of which, my microwave (which was responsible for cooking my steamed veggies) decided to go the way of the dinosaurs. now i have a fully-functioning rotating plate, but no waves of energy. managed to get the veggies heated in the oven, and dinner was a success - simple chicken breasts (3 PPV for mine), some boxed mashed taters (my serving was 4 PPV), the veggies (1 PPV, because of the sauce they were steamed in), a tomato salad (2 PPV for the olive oil), and some bread, and dinner was a big hit all around - and healthy! went on a very nice stroll through the local botanic gardens after dinner to see their christmas light display.
saturday: missed my workout with marko (he's super sick), but went to the gym and ran any way - needed the APs for dinner that night. we had adam's company party at a fancy steakhouse, and while i did very well (just 1 each of 2 appetizers and no wine), i still ended up at 48 PPV for the day. i am so not stressing, though, as that was only 18 of my WPA, and i had earned 10 APs earlier at the gym (i use my WPA before my APs, but it's all a mind game). thoroughly enjoyed myself without feeling deprived or guilty the next day when i got to tracking.
sunday: usually a lazy day, and it was. we did our grocery shopping (thanks, new PPV calculator, for your help there), and i stocked up on lots of fruit - for my house and adam's. had a delicious brunch that was full of protein, veggies, and some cheese, and made chicken mole tostadas for dinner. granted i didn't have a "real" lunch, but the extra dailies made my choice of additional sour cream and a side of brown rice a "yes."
i am really enjoying the extra flexibility having 6 extra daily points has given me (my DPA went from 24 to 30), and honestly, after months of feeling stuck, i finally feel invigorated by WW again. i ate a lot of my favorite foods this weekend - especially cheese! - and didn't once feel the urge to snack on things that were just lying around. have i been "perfect?" of course not - but for the first time in a really long time, i actually paid attention to what was going in my mouth and cared.
friday: invited a bunch of friends over for dinner, during the preparation of which, my microwave (which was responsible for cooking my steamed veggies) decided to go the way of the dinosaurs. now i have a fully-functioning rotating plate, but no waves of energy. managed to get the veggies heated in the oven, and dinner was a success - simple chicken breasts (3 PPV for mine), some boxed mashed taters (my serving was 4 PPV), the veggies (1 PPV, because of the sauce they were steamed in), a tomato salad (2 PPV for the olive oil), and some bread, and dinner was a big hit all around - and healthy! went on a very nice stroll through the local botanic gardens after dinner to see their christmas light display.
saturday: missed my workout with marko (he's super sick), but went to the gym and ran any way - needed the APs for dinner that night. we had adam's company party at a fancy steakhouse, and while i did very well (just 1 each of 2 appetizers and no wine), i still ended up at 48 PPV for the day. i am so not stressing, though, as that was only 18 of my WPA, and i had earned 10 APs earlier at the gym (i use my WPA before my APs, but it's all a mind game). thoroughly enjoyed myself without feeling deprived or guilty the next day when i got to tracking.
sunday: usually a lazy day, and it was. we did our grocery shopping (thanks, new PPV calculator, for your help there), and i stocked up on lots of fruit - for my house and adam's. had a delicious brunch that was full of protein, veggies, and some cheese, and made chicken mole tostadas for dinner. granted i didn't have a "real" lunch, but the extra dailies made my choice of additional sour cream and a side of brown rice a "yes."
i am really enjoying the extra flexibility having 6 extra daily points has given me (my DPA went from 24 to 30), and honestly, after months of feeling stuck, i finally feel invigorated by WW again. i ate a lot of my favorite foods this weekend - especially cheese! - and didn't once feel the urge to snack on things that were just lying around. have i been "perfect?" of course not - but for the first time in a really long time, i actually paid attention to what was going in my mouth and cared.
30 November 2010
goals for our end-of-year challenge
just so i can keep track of where i want to be by 12/31.
1. finish the year strong - capture my excitement about the new WW program and figure out how it works. really and truly get back to the basics, something i haven't done for quite awhile.
2. face holiday parties, christmas, my trip to georgia, and new year's with resolve - and make choices that i'm proud of, instead of ones i'll regret.
3. run at least one more race - the jingle bell run! - before the "real" winter sets in, and get up to the hills for some snowboard action!
4. this is the "tanya dries out" challenge as well - too much wine on thanksgiving has made me decide that a month without alcohol is something i need.
1. finish the year strong - capture my excitement about the new WW program and figure out how it works. really and truly get back to the basics, something i haven't done for quite awhile.
2. face holiday parties, christmas, my trip to georgia, and new year's with resolve - and make choices that i'm proud of, instead of ones i'll regret.
3. run at least one more race - the jingle bell run! - before the "real" winter sets in, and get up to the hills for some snowboard action!
4. this is the "tanya dries out" challenge as well - too much wine on thanksgiving has made me decide that a month without alcohol is something i need.
16 November 2010
feeling good.
it's been a long time since i've just been happy. happy with how i look, how i feel, what's happening in my life. where i haven't felt like there's some aspect of something to complain about. and right now, right at this moment, i'm happy. content. pleased. not looking for something else to "complete me." i like feeling like this.
tomorrow, adam and i celebrate our 1-year dating anniversary. seriously, the fastest year of my life, but i feel like i've known him forever. it's a good feeling, to feel so completely yourself around someone. there are really only a handful of people that i know that i feel this way when i'm with them, and it's different to have a man in that circle (who is not my brother and/or father). i like it.
while i'm not at my goal weight, or really that close to it, i feel better about my self-image than i have in a long time. and i'm not so worried about the weight coming off. i've been making better choices on a daily basis, and even though i've been "off-plan" - as in i haven't been tracking - i have been snacking less, and my workout routine remains consistent. i'm definitely on a plateau, but for the first time in a year, i'm not really upset about being here. i've come a LONG way.
i'm jazzed about the new program. i'm not one for change, as referenced in my last posting, but i am looking forward to this change. i enjoy getting new perspectives on this battle with food that i fight consistently, and i like hearing about the latest and greatest in science research (yes, i'm a big science nerd. don't act surprised). maybe the new look and the force to relearn what i "know" will push me off this plateau. if it doesn't, then i continue to maintain. and you know what? i'm a-okay with that.
tomorrow, adam and i celebrate our 1-year dating anniversary. seriously, the fastest year of my life, but i feel like i've known him forever. it's a good feeling, to feel so completely yourself around someone. there are really only a handful of people that i know that i feel this way when i'm with them, and it's different to have a man in that circle (who is not my brother and/or father). i like it.
while i'm not at my goal weight, or really that close to it, i feel better about my self-image than i have in a long time. and i'm not so worried about the weight coming off. i've been making better choices on a daily basis, and even though i've been "off-plan" - as in i haven't been tracking - i have been snacking less, and my workout routine remains consistent. i'm definitely on a plateau, but for the first time in a year, i'm not really upset about being here. i've come a LONG way.
i'm jazzed about the new program. i'm not one for change, as referenced in my last posting, but i am looking forward to this change. i enjoy getting new perspectives on this battle with food that i fight consistently, and i like hearing about the latest and greatest in science research (yes, i'm a big science nerd. don't act surprised). maybe the new look and the force to relearn what i "know" will push me off this plateau. if it doesn't, then i continue to maintain. and you know what? i'm a-okay with that.
04 November 2010
dealing with change
i've been rather contemplative the last couple days, and have chalked it up to just having a lot to do in a short timeframe. but it's more than that. life as i know it is about to change tremendously. not only is my BFF dating someone, or engaged, she'll be married in 48 hours. while the task of wedding planning will be over and she may have more time, she'll have a husband to go home to now; it won't be just "kate," everything will be "kate & chris." and while i love him dearly, and think they're perfectly matched, finding girl time will be something even more scheduled than it already is.
kate is my first really close friend to get married. the first of our "clan," if you will, and suddenly, what was 5 is now 4. or 3, since beans is moving to california at the end of the month. and though we're not thinking about getting married, adam and i are pretty serious, and i've already seen the change in the amount of time i see and spend with my roommate. what happens if adam and i do move in together? i'll see her even less!
i know. it's life. things change. priorities change. relationships change. and while i'm up for the changes - they're all good for everyone involved - i have to get used to the idea and adjust my vision. it'll take time. it'll take effort. but i think we'll all survive.
kate is my first really close friend to get married. the first of our "clan," if you will, and suddenly, what was 5 is now 4. or 3, since beans is moving to california at the end of the month. and though we're not thinking about getting married, adam and i are pretty serious, and i've already seen the change in the amount of time i see and spend with my roommate. what happens if adam and i do move in together? i'll see her even less!
i know. it's life. things change. priorities change. relationships change. and while i'm up for the changes - they're all good for everyone involved - i have to get used to the idea and adjust my vision. it'll take time. it'll take effort. but i think we'll all survive.
28 October 2010
for the record...
i am not getting married. at least, not that i'm aware of.
i made a comment on facebook the other day about david's bridal, and suddenly, the world thinks i'm getting married. gotta love gossip and the way people can read into things. so, for the record, i am not getting married.
my best friend gets married in 8 days. my brother is getting married in 6 months. another friend from college gets married 2 weeks after that. with the 2 i attended this year, and the prospective of 2-3 more for 2011, i'm over weddings. i'm over the stress. the travel. david's bridal. and i'm only in 2 of these weddings!
am i supremely happy? yes. do i think that adam and i will be together for a long long time? yes. neither of us in a rush to get to the next phase of our lives. we enjoy where we are. do we act like an old married couple? yes. but right now, the biggest step you'll see out of us is moving in together. and that's not even happening any time soon. at least not this year.
i made a comment on facebook the other day about david's bridal, and suddenly, the world thinks i'm getting married. gotta love gossip and the way people can read into things. so, for the record, i am not getting married.
my best friend gets married in 8 days. my brother is getting married in 6 months. another friend from college gets married 2 weeks after that. with the 2 i attended this year, and the prospective of 2-3 more for 2011, i'm over weddings. i'm over the stress. the travel. david's bridal. and i'm only in 2 of these weddings!
am i supremely happy? yes. do i think that adam and i will be together for a long long time? yes. neither of us in a rush to get to the next phase of our lives. we enjoy where we are. do we act like an old married couple? yes. but right now, the biggest step you'll see out of us is moving in together. and that's not even happening any time soon. at least not this year.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
